Movie #32 - Armageddon

Armageddon

Touchstone Pictures

1998 - Rated PG-13 - 2 hr 30 min

Director: Michael Bay

Starring: Bruce Willis, Billy Bob Thornton, Ben Affleck, Liv Tyler, Steve Buschemi, Owen Wilson, Michael Clarke Duncan

I was never really impressed with this movie. To me, it was just one of Michael Bay's early attempts to destroy the earth. This movie also doesn't know what it is. Action? Adventure? Love story? There are moments when it feels like a chick flick. And since it has a (sorta) happy ending, maybe it is a romance.

Perhaps the most annoying part of this movie is the narrow viewpoint it gives viewers. The world is going to get hit by a giant meteor and "life as we know it will end." You would think such an event would inspire a global collaboration of some kind... but since this movie is so quintessentially American, obviously the US has to do something to save everyone. Instead of watching different cultures to come together, oil rig workers and NASA scientists must learn to get along. And Liv Tyler is pure uselessness in this movie.

Don't get me started on the stupid plan they have to blow up the meteor. Drill into it and blow it apart with a nuke? Would that really even work? I demand a Myth Busters episode for this.

Anyway, I never really bought into all the hype about this movie. Now, 12 years later, I still feel like it's overrated and extremely unrealistic.

Movie #26 - Anaconda

Anaconda
Columbia Pictures
1997 - Rated R - 1 hr 29 min
Director: Luis Llosa
Starring: Jennifer Lopez, Ice Cube, Jon Voight, Eric Stoltz, and Owen Wilson

Say it with me, everyone, J-Lo can't act. But if you can get past that, the bad CGI snake, and Jon Voight's ridiculous accent, you're all set to enjoy this late 90's thriller. It's action-packed from beginning to end. Honestly, there's never been a fiercer snake lurking in any body of water, anywhere. This thing is ruthless and wants to eat everyone. It gets all manner of things done to it and still won't die. (Maybe that's because it's clearly robotic, but no one told J-Lo and friends.)

It's not very high quality, sure, but Anaconda still remains a guilty pleasure.