The Jackal
Universal Pictures
1997 - Rated R - 2 hr 5 min
Director: Michael Caton-Jones
Starring: Bruce Willis, Richard Gere, Sidney Poitier, Diane Venora
Alright, my third dose of Bruce Willis in 48 hours and he's finally the bad guy!! And what a good bad guy he plays, too. I love it.
Bruce cycles effortlessly from just-a-stache to platinum blonde to creepy trucker look. Meanwhile, Richard Gere has an Irish accent. Mike pointed out that if Bruce and Richard used to be partners and Bruce is allegedly Irish, shouldn't he also have an accent?
Apparently, when you're 1990's Bruce Willis, you can talk however you damn well please.
Anyway, this is a considerably better flick than Mercury Rising, but then most are. Not as good as 12 Monkeys for me, just not that much going on. And the whole Richard Gere is an international terrorist that's helping the FBI find a crazy person reminds me of The Rock. And when Sean Connery's involved, there's no contest. Sorry, Richard.
Tomorrow, I'm done with Bruce for a bit (probably until I reach D for Die Hard). Instead, it's Kevin Spacey time with 21. See you then!
Saturday, October 2, 2010
Movie #4 - Mercury Rising
Mercury Rising
Universal Pictures
1998 - Rated R - 1 hr 52 min
Director: Harold Becker
Starring: Bruce Willis, Alec Baldwin, Chi McBride, Kim Dickens
My Bruce Willis triple feature continues with this movie I've never seen. Hooray, a new movie! I should have been more suspicious about it, though, when Mike refused to watch this Bruce Willis action movie with me. Pass on that? Really? As I recall, he said, "Watching that once was enough."
Uh oh.
I purposely did not read the back of the DVD case so I wouldn't know what to expect. Right away, we're at a bank robbery and Bruce Willis is a bad guy. Ooh, a movie where Bruce Willis isn't the hero - I like it! The wall explodes, the FBI comes in, and nope... he's undercover. Oh well. Now we're in a classroom with an autistic kid named Simon, who likes road maps and puzzles.... Rad.
Simon is apparently a Rain-Man genius and can crack hidden code in his World of Puzzles book, cuz he finds a phone number in some weird, primordial Sudoku puzzle thing and calls it. It's The Puzzle Center (are you freaking kidding me?) and because he's cracked some code, they are now freaking out. Enter Alec Baldwin, who is displeased to learn that "Mercury is failing" cuz some autistic kid likes numbers.
Right.
Then some unimportant side characters are quoting "The Simpsons," because it was cool to do that back then. Skip to underlings explaining to Baldwin that they put a code in a puzzle magazine just for funsies, and he is pissssssssssssssed. Cuz the kid that cracked it, "Not only is he nine years old, he is handicapped. He is autistic." But you know, autistic people are often "savants," say the other guys. I'm pretty sure this whole scene is no longer PC, but thanks 1998.
I'm getting the feeling that Bruce Willis is going to have to protect the handicapped savant. And oh! Some FBI poser just killed Simon's mom and dad. But Simon gets away! Tricky little kid. He's in the closet, Bruce Willis! Look in the closet!
Uh oh, the guy who shot Simon's parents wasn't sent by Alec Baldwin! They must protect the Mercury code or else people who are undercover in Saddam's Republic Guard will be revealed!! And now someone else knows.... oh no! (They're losing me here.)
After some chase scenes and a couple close calls with a train, they're going to stay at Chi McBride's! He still had a full head of hair in 1998, by the way. (Bruce Willis did not.)
Lots of crazy things happen, Bruce Willis and Alec Baldwin have a show down... then it's all over. Simon can go back to school, get some foster parents, etc. Bruce Willis feels good about himself now. Warm fuzzies for everyone.
I did not like this movie at all. And I can now see what Mike is talking about. I'm pretty sure he only owns this movie because it came sandwiched between 12 Monkeys and The Jackal. As he says, "It's like buying the 12-pack of Gatorade and getting stuck with 3 orange ones. No one likes the orange."
Well, I like orange Gatorade but I did not like Mercury Rising.
Universal Pictures
1998 - Rated R - 1 hr 52 min
Director: Harold Becker
Starring: Bruce Willis, Alec Baldwin, Chi McBride, Kim Dickens
My Bruce Willis triple feature continues with this movie I've never seen. Hooray, a new movie! I should have been more suspicious about it, though, when Mike refused to watch this Bruce Willis action movie with me. Pass on that? Really? As I recall, he said, "Watching that once was enough."
Uh oh.
I purposely did not read the back of the DVD case so I wouldn't know what to expect. Right away, we're at a bank robbery and Bruce Willis is a bad guy. Ooh, a movie where Bruce Willis isn't the hero - I like it! The wall explodes, the FBI comes in, and nope... he's undercover. Oh well. Now we're in a classroom with an autistic kid named Simon, who likes road maps and puzzles.... Rad.
Simon is apparently a Rain-Man genius and can crack hidden code in his World of Puzzles book, cuz he finds a phone number in some weird, primordial Sudoku puzzle thing and calls it. It's The Puzzle Center (are you freaking kidding me?) and because he's cracked some code, they are now freaking out. Enter Alec Baldwin, who is displeased to learn that "Mercury is failing" cuz some autistic kid likes numbers.
Right.
Then some unimportant side characters are quoting "The Simpsons," because it was cool to do that back then. Skip to underlings explaining to Baldwin that they put a code in a puzzle magazine just for funsies, and he is pissssssssssssssed. Cuz the kid that cracked it, "Not only is he nine years old, he is handicapped. He is autistic." But you know, autistic people are often "savants," say the other guys. I'm pretty sure this whole scene is no longer PC, but thanks 1998.
I'm getting the feeling that Bruce Willis is going to have to protect the handicapped savant. And oh! Some FBI poser just killed Simon's mom and dad. But Simon gets away! Tricky little kid. He's in the closet, Bruce Willis! Look in the closet!
Uh oh, the guy who shot Simon's parents wasn't sent by Alec Baldwin! They must protect the Mercury code or else people who are undercover in Saddam's Republic Guard will be revealed!! And now someone else knows.... oh no! (They're losing me here.)
After some chase scenes and a couple close calls with a train, they're going to stay at Chi McBride's! He still had a full head of hair in 1998, by the way. (Bruce Willis did not.)
Lots of crazy things happen, Bruce Willis and Alec Baldwin have a show down... then it's all over. Simon can go back to school, get some foster parents, etc. Bruce Willis feels good about himself now. Warm fuzzies for everyone.
I did not like this movie at all. And I can now see what Mike is talking about. I'm pretty sure he only owns this movie because it came sandwiched between 12 Monkeys and The Jackal. As he says, "It's like buying the 12-pack of Gatorade and getting stuck with 3 orange ones. No one likes the orange."
Well, I like orange Gatorade but I did not like Mercury Rising.
Friday, October 1, 2010
Movie #3 - 12 Monkeys
12 Monkeys
Universal Pictures
1995 - 2 hr 10 min - Rated R
Director: Terry Gilliam
Starring: Bruce Willis, Madeleine Stowe, Brad Pitt, Christopher Plummer
Here's my first *unopened* DVD! 12 Monkeys is the first movie in this Triple Feature DVD pack. It also includes Mercury Rising and The Jackal which are next on my list to watch, making this order seem to go off my alphabetical trail. But really it's not, since the whole set is categorized under 12 Monkeys.
Anyway... here goes.
Does it get any better than a 90's era Bruce Willis flick? This is only the second time I've seen 12 Monkeys and I couldn't remember much about it. I remember that the first time I saw it, I was a bit disappointed. All that hype, you know? But now, with more than a decade's added perspective, I can definitely see what made this movie such a big deal. And it has more to do with the inventive premise than it does with Brad Pitt's naked, crazy ass.
Of course, all I could think about when I saw Brad Pitt in this (a great performance, by the way) was that quote from Clueless about Brad Pitt being hot in everthing, "except 12 Monkeys, when he had that weird eye thing."
Also on my mind was the Christopher Plummer double feature that I had this afternoon. First as 1 in 9, then as Dr. Goines in 12 Monkeys. Three movies in and I've already got repeat actors!
As for the movie itself, I loved it this time around. Brad Pitt crazy but harmless, Bruce Willis watching himself die, and that no-name-actress I haven't seen in anything since this movie, dying her hair blond. Man, that's a good ending!
So, we're down three movies... only 600-something left to go! I might squeeze in a fourth tonight, if I can convince Mike to watch Mercury Rising. I'll be back whenever I finish my next viewing!
Universal Pictures
1995 - 2 hr 10 min - Rated R
Director: Terry Gilliam
Starring: Bruce Willis, Madeleine Stowe, Brad Pitt, Christopher Plummer
Here's my first *unopened* DVD! 12 Monkeys is the first movie in this Triple Feature DVD pack. It also includes Mercury Rising and The Jackal which are next on my list to watch, making this order seem to go off my alphabetical trail. But really it's not, since the whole set is categorized under 12 Monkeys.
Anyway... here goes.
Does it get any better than a 90's era Bruce Willis flick? This is only the second time I've seen 12 Monkeys and I couldn't remember much about it. I remember that the first time I saw it, I was a bit disappointed. All that hype, you know? But now, with more than a decade's added perspective, I can definitely see what made this movie such a big deal. And it has more to do with the inventive premise than it does with Brad Pitt's naked, crazy ass.
Of course, all I could think about when I saw Brad Pitt in this (a great performance, by the way) was that quote from Clueless about Brad Pitt being hot in everthing, "except 12 Monkeys, when he had that weird eye thing."
Also on my mind was the Christopher Plummer double feature that I had this afternoon. First as 1 in 9, then as Dr. Goines in 12 Monkeys. Three movies in and I've already got repeat actors!
As for the movie itself, I loved it this time around. Brad Pitt crazy but harmless, Bruce Willis watching himself die, and that no-name-actress I haven't seen in anything since this movie, dying her hair blond. Man, that's a good ending!
So, we're down three movies... only 600-something left to go! I might squeeze in a fourth tonight, if I can convince Mike to watch Mercury Rising. I'll be back whenever I finish my next viewing!
Movie #2 - 9
9 Focus Features
2009 - Rated PG-13 - 1 hr 20 min
Director: Shane Acker
Starring: Elijah Wood, John C Reilly, Jennifer Connelly, Christopher Plummer, Crispin Glover, Martin Landau, Fred Tatasciore
This one is nice and short at 80 minutes, so I'm moving right along today.
9 is another good one - not one of my favorites, but fun to watch. Something about Elijah Wood as the main character, though, makes this heroic post-apocalyptic plight akin to a LOTR adventure. Just substitute a small troupe of robot Beanie Babies for the Hobbits and voila! And as for the whole the-nine-robot-Beanie-Babies-are-pieces-of-the-scientist's-soul business? That sounds like Voldemort's horcruxes to me...
Still, the movie is an enjoyable one. Lots of fun visuals, an intriguing premise, and an incredible cast of voice actors including Christopher Plummer and John C. Reilly. I wouldn't think watching a team of tiny, artificially intelligent beings battle robotic skeleton cats would be so riveting, but there you go. Ellie seemed to enjoy it too, but I don't think she was really following the plot.
Overall, though, this was another dark, bleak movie... two of those in a row plus this rainy weather is really bumming me out. Where are the comedies at right now?
Looks like I still have a ways to go before I get something lighter. 12 Monkeys is next - one of a triple feature collection that also includes Mercury Rising and The Jackal. I don't get anything funny until move #7. Argh.
Movie #1 - 8 Mile
8 Mile
Universal Pictures
2003 - Rated R - 1 hr 51 min
Director: Curtis Hanson
Starring: Eminem, Kim Basinger, Brittany Murphy, Mekhi Phifer
*WARNING: These reviews are gonna contain "spoilers" so don't read 'em if you want to watch the movie and be surprised.*
We're off to a strong start this morning with Eminem's semi-autobiographic pic 8 Mile.
For starters, this is the kind of movie during which Ellie was not wearing her hearing aids. Every third word or so is an F-bomb, which didn't bother me before I had kids. Now, it doesn't bother me per se, just my Mom Brain.
Anyway, 8 Mile is pretty good. I remember liking it a lot in the theater, and that theme song "Lose Yourself" (which plays in the background for almost the entire movie) is catchy. I will probably be humming it for a while, or until I watch the next movie. Still, overall it's a pretty depressing flick, since it basically recounts Eminem's motivation to get up on stage and hate rap. The end sequence of the battle is the best part of the movie, excepting the awkward Eminem/Brittany Murphy sex scene in a stamping plant. Classy.
I don't know how much of the story is true to his life (or when Dr. Dre is supposed to show up), but 8 Mile could probably also qualify as a Michael Moore documentary with its not-so-subtle commentary on life in Detriot (or the 313, whatever your flavor). You can certainly understand, after watching this, why Eminem would want to get the hell out of there... and why Brittany Murphy's character would sleep with a guy named "Wink" to start a modeling career.
Yikes.
Onward and upward... Next up is the kid's movie 9. Talk about variety!
Universal Pictures
2003 - Rated R - 1 hr 51 min
Director: Curtis Hanson
Starring: Eminem, Kim Basinger, Brittany Murphy, Mekhi Phifer
*WARNING: These reviews are gonna contain "spoilers" so don't read 'em if you want to watch the movie and be surprised.*
We're off to a strong start this morning with Eminem's semi-autobiographic pic 8 Mile.
For starters, this is the kind of movie during which Ellie was not wearing her hearing aids. Every third word or so is an F-bomb, which didn't bother me before I had kids. Now, it doesn't bother me per se, just my Mom Brain.
Anyway, 8 Mile is pretty good. I remember liking it a lot in the theater, and that theme song "Lose Yourself" (which plays in the background for almost the entire movie) is catchy. I will probably be humming it for a while, or until I watch the next movie. Still, overall it's a pretty depressing flick, since it basically recounts Eminem's motivation to get up on stage and hate rap. The end sequence of the battle is the best part of the movie, excepting the awkward Eminem/Brittany Murphy sex scene in a stamping plant. Classy.
I don't know how much of the story is true to his life (or when Dr. Dre is supposed to show up), but 8 Mile could probably also qualify as a Michael Moore documentary with its not-so-subtle commentary on life in Detriot (or the 313, whatever your flavor). You can certainly understand, after watching this, why Eminem would want to get the hell out of there... and why Brittany Murphy's character would sleep with a guy named "Wink" to start a modeling career.
Yikes.
Onward and upward... Next up is the kid's movie 9. Talk about variety!
Thursday, September 30, 2010
The First Shelf
Our journey along the Movie Wall begins with a short shelf. On it, we have the titles preceeding A (i.e. numerical titles) and then some of the letter A movies themselves.My first goal is to complete this first shelf by October 8, which gives me one week. As I look at this shelf and take note of some of these movies, I'm immediately regretting this decision. But the gauntlet has been thrown down! I will do this!
On this shelf are the following movies:
- 8 Mile
- 9
- 12 Monkeys / Mercury Rising / The Jackal (3-movie set)
- 21
- 27 Dresses
- 28 Days Later
- The 40-year-old Virgin
- 300
- (500) Days of Summer
- Accepted
- Ace Ventura: Pet Detective
- Across the Universe
- Adaptation
- Adventures in Babysitting
- The Adventures of Milo & Otis
- Airplane!
- Aladdin
- Alexander
- Alice in Wonderland (Disney cartoon)
- Alice in Wonderland (Johnny Depp - hello!)
- Along Came Polly
- American Beauty
- American Dreamz
- Anaconda
That's 26* movies to watch... in 7 days... Although the impetus to watch Johnny Depp will carry me through this shelf, I have no doubt. Indeed, if every shelf has a Depp movie on it, this will be a piece of cake.
Hear that everyone? Don't buy us any more movies without Johnny Depp in them!
And here we go...
*I took off "10th Kingdom" since it is a mini-series, rather than a theatrical movie. See new rule #11 for specifics.
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