2008 - Rated PG-13 - 2 hr 2 min
Director: Steven Spielberg
Starring: Harrison Ford, Karen Allen, Cate Blanchett, Shia LeBeouf, Ray Winstone, John Hurt, Jim Broadbent
Nearly twenty years after Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade, Lucas and friends thought it would be a good idea to relive the glory days with a brand new adventure. Indiana's middle-aged now, still getting into trouble, and dealing with getting old and losing friends and his dad.
I have to admit - especially after seeing the Rocky Balboa, a similar attempt - I had my reservations. My initial reaction? "This is gonna suck." But my love of Indiana drew me to the theater anyway and I tried to give it a chance. Despite a short nap somewhere in the middle, I saw it.... and hated it.
Lots of the jokes felt rehashed and recycled. Everyone had wrinkles. (Not a problem, except when you're not using to seeing these characters like that.) And the whole Shia LeBeouf thing could've been better than it was.... I mean, what kind of name is Mutt? Is that a weak play on "We named the dog Indiana" and now your son has a dog name too? That's stupid, George Lucas. Stupid.
Mike insisted on buying this DVD to complete our quartet and so I had to watch it again. Them's the rules. So for the first time since that horrific day in the theater, I watched Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. This time, I did not fall asleep. And I really did give it a fair shot.
So here's my new impression. **SPOILER ALERT** The first 3/4 of the movie aren't any worse than Temple of Doom. There's a clear adventure in the works, and assorted curve balls get Indiana on his way. The whole Karen Allen and her son subplot is worked in well, so it's not too jarring when you find out about that. Actually, you kind of guess it.
But then you get to the end. ALIENS? ALIENS, GEORGE? WHAT THE HELL?! The ending ruins everything. I might even take the aliens if it weren't for the whole "They're not from outer space, they're from and interdimension, the space between spaces" bull crap. I call shenanigans. And then the "space ship" or whatever the heck it is, lifts up and creates a giant rock tornado - that SOMEHOW does NOT kill anyone standing two feet away from it - and goes up and away into not space, but "inter space." WHAT THE HELL, GEORGE LUCAS? All of a sudden, Indiana Jones is a sci-fi. I hate this so much.
I really wanted the movie to be better the second time. And I managed to stomach the lame rehashed jokes and wrinkles this time. I even laugh when Indiana teases Marion for getting captured.... again (see my Raiders review). But I can't accept the aliens. I just can't.
I find he stink made over the aliens a bit odd. I mean really is it any more ludicrous than the Ark, the Grail or the magic stones and still beating hearts? The series has always capped off with validating the mystical belief behind a real world artifact, and aliens are just another belief that get validated. Not saying it's a good movie but of all the problems with the movie (the nuked fridge, the Tarzan swinging monkies, the fact that it stays in the US too long, etc) that seems like an odd one to toss the movie aside on to me.
ReplyDeleteI guess I'm alien biased... The nuked fridge does bother me. Especially since the Myth Busters were all over that. And yeah, it drags while we're in the US - and for pointless reasons too. I guess I could get past that but not aliens. Huh. Must just be my own mental block there.
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